Forgive

There is a Hawaiian meditation called Ho’oponopono, which means to make it right with the ancestors, or to make right with the people with whom you have relationships. (The original purpose of Ho’oponopono was to correct the wrongs that had occurred in someone’s life including Hala (to miss the thing aimed for, or to err, to disobey) and Hewa (to go overboard or to do something to excess) which were illusions, and ‘Ino (to do harm, implying to do harm to someone with hate in mind), even if accidental. In the simplest form of this practice one holds the incident in their mind and repeats the mantra: I’m sorry, please forgive me, I love you, I thank you.

This morning on a walk with the dogs we passed a house where a friend of mine used to live. I found myself ruminating about a regrettable comment I’d made to him at a dinner party. I’d derided him, thinking that this was humorous and I’d unintentionally insulted him. I recalled the hurt in his eyes. And I relived the experience, there, in front of where he used to live so many years ago. And there, on the sidewalk, happy healthy dogs in hand, under a clear blue sky, the morning dew sparkling under the shining sun, I began to beat myself up.

How could I have been so insensitive? I’d simply followed patterns I’d witnessed from my parents. I know now, that at the time, it had been my way of dealing with my discomfort of saying what I really wanted to say. Speaking my “truth.” That is, you are so smart and talented. And, I really admire you and value your insights. This corrupt tape has played in my mind so many times! Too many. It is time to resolve this. Refresh the page.

The dogs stretched their leashes taught trying to get to a squirrel; and I realized I could stretch my restraints, too. It is time that I forgive myself. Open space in my mind for new creative thoughts. And so, I tell myself: I’m sorry, please forgive me, I love you, and, I thank you.